Check

"Hey how are you? 
I love burger abs lobster! It is definitely my favourite restaurant in London! Always go for the lobster though right? :-) I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. 
Would you risk it for a chocolate biscuit?"



Hey there you!

This is just a quick note to congratulate you on following all the rules of a first message. Honestly mate, you should be really proud that you can read through a checklist...

Step 1. Ask her how she is. This will make her think you're emotionally sensitive and in-tune with her needs.

Step 2. Let her know you're interested in things she's also interested in. If her profile photo features her eating lobster in a bib, make a passing comment about the restaurant. Bonus points for asking a follow-up question.

Step 3. Make her laugh. Not with your personality, silly! Try telling a joke, possibly involving animals. Girls love animals.

Step 4. End with a quote/question. She will find this so irresistibly mysterious that you'll definitely find a message from her in your inbox tomorrow morning!

Step 5. Enjoy sifting through the piles of replies you receive! Have a great time humping and dumping, like the King of Ladies' Men that you are. Happy Hunting!

You've nailed it, fella! I should be asking you what time and where you want us to meet up (at your earliest convenience, obviously), but I realise I'm just one in a hundred girls who are definitely lining up to date you, and you'll never notice little old me. I should just give up, right?

Off to try some of those tasty-sounding 'burger abs' instead.

This Girl